In 2002, a fellow youth evangelist shared a prophecy about 2012. He said that we only had 10 years left and that we should strive to be part of a small flock. Since then, my life has changed a lot, and I am gathering with like-minded young people to unite, study, present, evangelize, clean churches, and nurture the dream of heaven.

The world didn't matter, you didn't need success, you didn't need money, you didn't need a job, you didn't need specs, you didn't need worldly relationships, and if you were a parent, you weren't a parent if you didn't go to church. And that's what happened. We created our own world. Some were seminarians, some were pastor's wives, some were deacons, some were evangelists... We all thought we were on our way to our respective talents. Later, we married, but not for the sake of a happy family or the education of our children.

I was going to heaven soon, so to fill the gap, I left my nonverbal child at church to study the Bible and do evangelism. As I turned around with tears in my eyes, leaving my child crying because she didn't want to be separated from me, I thought, 'This hurts, but this is my payment for my sins in heaven'. There was a lot going on, but all of my life's focus was on 2012, and it felt right.

But alas, 2012 passed and nothing happened. But I had a spiritual mother, and she told me, "Don't worry, you're going to heaven, where there is no sorrow, no pain, no suffering..." She comforted me by saying this. But the Spirit Mother said, "God is at the door," "I hear footsteps," "He is coming soon," but He did not come. "The behavior of the saints is the problem," "the heart is the problem," "the character is the problem," "the personality is the problem," "the speech is the problem," and so on.... In other words, they put the blame on the believer.

We started to burn out, and I think it wasn't just me, it was other people. People who were telling us to focus more on God's work, people who were encouraging us to stop doing worldly things, one by one they started going to work, and one day you wouldn't see them in church.

My children's emotions and education began to suffer, and as the head of the household, I was unable to take care of them properly, which led to household difficulties, illness, and a sharp drop in self-esteem.